


Neighbors

by Here2read



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M, Mental Scarring, Past Abuse, really not good at tagging
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-30
Updated: 2017-01-19
Packaged: 2018-08-18 17:14:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,756
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8169619
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Here2read/pseuds/Here2read
Summary: When Sam Winchester first met Gabriel Novak he was just 16 and living with his older brother Dean. Their friendship grew over the next few years, but suddenly he dropped off the grid. When reunited, will they rehash their friendship or will their relationship fall apart before it even began?
(please be kind to me this is my first fanfic)





	1. First Impressions

**Author's Note:**

> Hello AO3!!! I'm finally joining your ranks of authors! This story was just something I thought up, and figured I'd try to write it. This work is unbetaed and if you find any errors please feel free to tell me. I promise my writing skills will improve as time goes on, but for now, bear with me. I just need practice. I work a lot so sometimes I'll post weekly or monthly but please nag me if I let it go too long. If you want to check out my tumbler its badluckbelle. Thanks for reading!

     “See ya, Sammy,” Dean called over his shoulder as he shut the door with a final sounding Click. Sam shot a bitch face at the door and turned back to his homework, shifting absently on his chair. Dean would be at work for the rest of the afternoon, and well into the night. It took a lot to pay for their dingy apartment; close to the school and comparatively very safe. Sam knew, though he would never tell Dean, how hard he’d worked for the relative security they had. Sighing tiredly, he scratched out another equation, pencil loud in the silence.  
A loud thump sounded from upstairs, followed by shuffling then loud music, thudding with heavy bass. The table vibrated, distracting him and after a moment he gave up, filing away his papers for later. Dean wouldn’t be happy he skipped his homework, but Dean didn’t need to know. His older brother could be very irritatingly parent-like, especially recently. Sam knew he was trying to make up for their past, but he didn’t need a parent, he needed a friend. Groaning, Sam put his hands over his ears, blocking out all but the bass that thrummed in his bones. Fuck this shit, he thought angrily.

 

     Sam banged on the door marked 405, vibrating with fury. This asshole had kept him up for two weeks straight now, and his grades were suffering. If something didn’t change soon, his chances at a scholarship would be out of reach forever. The music continued uninterrupted and he knocked again, slamming his fist against the thin metal until it shook. Finally, he heard the snick of a lock, and the door swung open. His jaw dropped at the Adonis before him, all blonde hair and twinkling green eyes. The music thudded in the background; forgotten like his earlier anger. “Do you need something?” He asked, and Sam crashed back to reality.  
“Fuck, yeah uh I live in the apartment below you and you constantly blasting your music is really messing up my sleep. I’ve got finals coming up man so keep it down, okay?” He sputtered, at a loss when faced with the gorgeous man.

  
     The blonde cocked an eyebrow, smirking. “And if I refused? What then, kiddo?” He challenged. Sam couldn’t tell if he meant the statement as a joke or not, but answered anyway.

  
     “I’d have to come in there and shut it off myself. What part of I have finals do you not understand?” His voice wavered slightly as he kept eye contact with his neighbor. The man smiled- a real genuine grin and gestured inside turning to shut the music off. Confused but more than willing to learn more about his new neighbor, he followed.  
“I’m Gabriel,” the man sighed, sitting on a dingy couch and propping his feet on a taped box. Sam took the remaining chair, watching Gabriel with wary eyes. He wasn’t sure if he could trust him, wasn’t even sure if he should be here, but something told him to stay.  
“Sam,” He told the man, giving a hesitant smile.

  
     “Nice to meetcha Sammy. Wanna tell me what a teen like you is doing in a shithole like this?” Gabriel queried, gesturing to their surroundings. Sam had to agree with his description, the apartment complex was small and dilapidated, with stains and holes. The place was run down, but since rent was cheap, the boys had to make do. Sam winced at the nickname though, running his hands through his shoulder length hair as he spoke.  
“Its Sam, nobody calls me Sammy anymore. And we live here because rent is cheap and we don’t have much money. This is the safest place we’ve found yet, and Dean wants me to have a bright future no matter what,” He grimaced, annoyance at Dean’s overbearing tendancies showing through. He shrugged after a moment, considering what to tell the older man. “Dean works a lot, and he says I can’t get a job to help until after graduation. But he’s doing his best.”

     “Who’s Dean, kiddo?” Gabriel asked, “Is he your boyfriend?” Sam couldn’t help but wish he heard jealousy in the older man’s voice, but knew he wasn’t that lucky. So instead, he shook his head with a laugh.

     “No, just my overprotective older brother. He’s a mechanic, and works really late. I’m usually asleep by the time he gets back.” Sam sighed dejectedly, remembering all the nights he spent alone, jumping at every sound. Too many years with John taught him to always be on alert.  
Gabriel tutted gently, sympathy clear on his face. He seemed to know there was more to Sam’s story, but didn’t press the matter. Instead, he posed thoughtfully for a moment before his expression brightened comically. “I know how to help! Whenever you’re feeling lonely, or Dean’s out for the day, you can stop by here and hang out as long as you want!” His green eyes sparked excitedly making warmth spread through the younger Winchester. The asshole he first mistook Gabriel for disappeared, replaced by a good-hearted man down on his luck.

     Sam grinned at his antics, and nodded enthusiastically. “I’d like that very much. Dean’ll want to meet you, but that’s fine, right?” He winced, thinking about the possible display of dominance his brother was bound to try. Chest pounding and swagger was so cliché and yet somehow his brother thought it seemed necessary at all times. Honestly, it exhasperated him.

     “Well until then Sam, would you like to stay? I’d love to learn more about my new neighbor, and it seems you’re not needed elsewhere just now,” Gabriel offered, widening his arms to take in the tiny apartment. Sam nodded eagerly, probably too eagerly, but with a text to Dean he made sure his older brother wouldn’t start a man hunt just yet. He really wanted to get to know his new neighbor, hoped for a friendship to grow eventually.  
“So how old are you?” He asked the blonde, wondering just how big the gap stretched between them. He gingerly sipped at the soda, trying to judge Gabriel’s age before he answered.

     “Twenty-one if you must know,” Gabriel huffed in pretend annoyance. “Just moved to the city, found this dungheap and figured I’d settle down.” He sipped his beer, glinting eyes belying his humor. Sam nodded to himself, relieved their ages weren’t that far apart. A five year difference wasn’t that bad right? Gabriel tipped his bottle towards the boy, waiting for his reply as he sipped the beer.

  
     “I’m sixteen. We used to travel a lot, but Dean wanted us to settle down and be a real family. He thinks it’ll look better on a college application if I stay in the same school for a few years, and I don’t really have much choice, do I?” It’s not that he resented his older brother, but sometimes he just wanted to have choices of his own to make. The constant hovering and nagging could get really annoying; Dean acted like he expected to jump in front of a bullet. Gabriel nodded understandingly, sipping his beer thoughtfully.

  
     They traded little facts about each other well into the evening, until the windows were dark enough to reflect the dim fluorescent lights. Sam found out a lot about his new friend, and probably told Gabriel a lot too. He learned Gabe had been the third in a line of six children, he adored his younger siblings but found he needed a change. He’d finished college with an associates degree in liberal arts, discovering too late how few places wanted a ‘wishy-washy little liberal’. His favorite color was brown, and he absolutely loved candy. Sam had probably watched the man eat at least three bowls of chocolates before the evening was over.  
All too soon a knock came at the door, causing them both to jump guiltily. Without even looking, he knew it was Dean come to collect him like some prom princess. As soon as the door opened, Dean came barging in like some sort of caveman, chest pushed out and puffed up like a peacock. Sam rolled his eyes, disgusted by the display of alpha male. Gabriel seemed unphased however, and just pulled out a sucker from his coat. “Dean, I presume?” He said, popping the candy into his mouth with a moan. Sam turned pink at the sound, filing it away for later.

  
     Dean looked at the man, still in a protective stance. “What do you want with Sam?” He asked, voice low and threatening. Sam threw his hands up in defeat. Sometimes his brother could be insane, he’d warned Gabriel but apparently Dean was aiming for a new record of dickish behavior. If he ruined this chance of friendship, he’d replace Dean’s shampoo with Nair out of spite.

  
     “Well, Dean-o,” Gabriel began, nonplussed. “I offered him a safe place to come stay when you’re out and about. I’m not looking for trouble kid, I’m just a lonely old man who likes to have company.” The joke cracked Sam up, but seemed to deflate Dean. He looked over the apartment and furnishings, nodded once and looked at Sam. Feeling the gazes of both men, Sam blushed and looked down.

  
     “I’d like to drop by when possible, if that’s ok?” He questioned, glancing up at his brother with puppy dog eyes. Dean sighed in exasperation, finally shrugging his answer as he headed for the door.

 

     Dean turned to Gabriel with a meanacing glare. "If you so much as touch a single hair on his head, I will kill you." With that he stormed off into the hallway without so much as a backward glance. Sam blushed scarlet, humiliated by his brother's presumptions. Gabe just chuckled and shook his head.

  
      Gabe jerked his head towards Dean and smiled gently, “Go on kiddo, I’ll keep the music down from now on. Pinky promise.” Sam laughed at his overly innocent expression and followed his brother home, already planning his next visit.


	2. Something Precious

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gabriel force feeds Sam Firefly, and Drunk!Dean makes a surprise appearance. Gabriel reveals a protective side and argues with Dean a little.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know i planned on posting weekly, but I just couldn't stop the flow of words.

     “You’ve never seen Firefly?” Gabriel shouted, eyes practically bugging from his head. “You have got to be kidding me! All right Sammich, we’re marathoning this shit right now. Tell Dean he’ll have to deal with me stealing you, or join us.” He dictated, pulling a boxed set from a cabinet below the TV. Sam watched, confused by his friend’s animated reaction, almost expecting him to spring into song and dance. What he didn’t expect was for Gabe to pull him down onto the couch next to him as he turned on the first episode.

     Squished next to Gabe on the tiny sofa, Sam couldn’t help but revel in the older man’s scent and warmth. He cherished moments like this, though he would never tell Gabe or Dean how much their attention meant to him. Secretly he felt starved for touch, and that was something he’d take to the grave, but until then he’d take what he could get. “You realize finals are just a few days away right?” He protested weakly, immediately shushed by Gabriel.

     “Firefly is more important. You’re smart, you’ll do fine kiddo,” he muttered distractedly, eyes fixed to the screen where explosions lit up the living room. Sam rolled his eyes in exhasperation but gave into his friend’s persistence. After all, he could study at school, and this show seemed to mean a lot to Gabe. So instead of arguing, he settled against  
Gabe’s side and forced his attention away from the smell of cloves and spices that his friend exuded in intoxicatingly powerful waves.

     Four hours later, Sam was dozing off. Night had crept up on them, blanketing the apartment in darkness. He tried to keep his head up, really he did. But after the second time he fell into Gabriel’s shoulder the older man took notice. “Samalam, wake up. We gotta get you home and to bed, or Dean’ll kill me.” He nudged the boy awake, laughing as Sam snorted himself awake.

     “Wha- What time is it?” Sam yawned, looking sleep ruffled and disoriented. He found himself in Gabriel’s apartment, windows dark and Firefly playing in the background. Dean, that’s right. Dean should be home by now.

     “A little past midnight. C’mon kiddo, your brother’s probably worried sick about you.” Gabriel stood, stretching and revealing a sliver of his flat stomach, a fact Sam’s sleep addled brain couldn’t help but notice.

     Finally Sam stood with a groan, still half asleep and none too happy about being forced out of his warm seat. Gabe put an arm around his shoulders and tugged him downstairs. Sam stumbled to his door, unlocking it in a daze and sighing at the cool darkness that greeted him. Gabriel peered into the apartment concernedly. “Where’s your brother, Sammy?” He queried.

     With a shrug Sam turned on the lights; this wasn’t the first time Dean had been out all night. Sometimes he just stopped at a bar after work or met up with one of his floozies. Sam had gotten used to the emptiness of their apartment, and dealing with his drunk older brother stumbling in at god-awful in the morning. Gabe followed behind him, taking in their neat but sparse home. “Its fine Gabe, this isn’t the first time I’ve been left alone. Go home,” He yawned hugely, grabbing his backpack off the kitchen table and stumbled to his room. He ignored the torn look on Gabe’s face in favor of flopping down on his bed.

     “I don’t feel right leaving you here alone Sam. How’s about I sit with you till your brother gets back?” Gabe’s tone was carefully neutral, cautious even. God he was old, acting like a parent concerned for the wellbeing of a child. Sam couldn’t even muster up the strength to be annoyed at his protectiveness. Really, it was a relief to know someone would be there with him, just in case.

     Head buried in his pillows –he really needed to wash them soon- his response was muffled. “Fine, I don’t care.” He kicked off his shoes and nestled further into his bed as Gabriel’s footsteps approached. He knew the older man was trying to absorb his unusual aesthetic, a mix of science and classic rock posters that Dean forced him to buy. Gabe finally settled in to the desk chair, and Sam could feel the older man’s gaze on him. Feeling safer than he had in a very long time, the youngest Winchester fell into a deep slumber.

     He didn’t know how long he slept before whispering voices broke through his dreams. “Do you realize what time it is? How often do you do this, hmm?” Gabriels accusatory voice hissed.

     “I was out, it’s not like I have to explain myself to you. The fuck are you doing here anyways?” Dean slurred. He heard shuffling and a thump, probably Dean settling into a chair.

     “I wanted to make sure Sam was safe, ‘cause he’s scared. I dunno what he’s scared of, he refuses to tell me. But I’m not giving up yet. He’s something to be protected, and you’re failing at your job. Jesus Dean-o, how drunk are you?” Gabriel chided. Dean’s slurred answer didn’t reach Sam’s ears before he drifted off again.  
He woke with a start to his alarm blasting Asia and fifteen minutes to get to school. He scrambled out of bed and got dressed. Grabbing his bag he raced to the door, nearly tripping over an unconscious Dean spread across the hallway. Memories from last night flooded back as he jumped his brother’s sleeping form and headed to school. So, he thought, Gabe stayed with him until Dean got home. He thought Sam needed protecting too, like a damsel in distress. What was with everyone thinking he couldn’t handle himself? And scared? He knew he wasn’t that obvious about his feelings, or Gabe would definitely feel a little weirded out.

     Dean had come home drunk again, he realized. Not surprising really, seeing as he worked all the time. He had to find some release, and it didn’t really matter to Sam so long as he didn’t start down John’s path. The instant Dean raised a hand to him, he’d be out. Gabriel would take him in, he knew, despite their brief friendship. Sam didn’t much care about Dean’s alcoholic tendencies, but apparently Gabriel’d had something to say about it, or so Sam thought. The more he went over it in his head, the fuzzier his memory got.  
     Making a mental note to bring this up with Gabriel, Sam jogged the last block to school and made it just in time for classes to begin. Thudding down to his assigned seat, he pulled out his homework and waited for Mr. Singer to start the class.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo.... apparently Sam's school life wants to make an appearance, which means I'll be bringing out a few friends for him in the next chapter. Promise to get back to Gabriel and Sam's relationship soon! Thanks for sticking with this story!


	3. Princess Sam

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks to my amazing beta maryssa172!!! I couldn't have got this chapter finished without her!

To be completely fair, his friends waited until a free period before cornering him in the hall. Ash leaned close to Sam, peering closely at his face. Charlie and Jo stood on either side of him, effectively blocking whatever chance he had to escape. Ash prodded Sam’s chest accusingly. “Since when have you started keeping secrets from us, man?” When the question was met with a confused look from Sam, he continued. “You’ve been practically floating through classes all day. We ain’t got a problem with you being happy, but it’s getting a little concerning. What’s up?” Sam fidgeted uncomfortably under his friends’ intense stares. He hadn’t thought that he’d been so obvious about it.

“I- I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Sam hedged, ears turning pink.

 Charlie's nose wrinkled and she immediately adopted a visage of disbelief. It was obvious that the redhead could see through his bullshit. She leaned forward until they were nose to nose, her green gaze unnerving. "Yes. You do," his friend stated firmly and with the authority of a thousand professors Sam fidgeted again, feeling the weight of their gazes pressing down on him. “Something changed and put you on cloud nine, I’ve never seen you this happy. What is it? Or is it a who?” She asked, waggling her eyebrows suggestively. Sam’s face flushed a brilliant red and she grinned. “C’mon Sam, spill the beans.”

"I... I met someone is all..." he finally murmured quietly, blushing and looking at the floor. Their eyes widened in synch, and the girls surged forward. Ash got knocked off balance and crashed into Sam as the teen tried to steady himself. When he recovered he was grinning and both girls were watching with rapt attention, waiting for Sam to continue. Obviously, he couldn’t avoid their questions. Finally, he gave in with a sigh. “I met the guy that lives in the apartment above us. He’s been letting me spend the afternoons at his place while Dean’s at work.”

Jo grinned, sensing juicy gossip. “No way that’s all, Sam. Not with the way you’ve been acting all dreamy. You two can’t just be friends…right?” She prodded. Her blue eyes practically glowed at the thought of her friend in love.

Sam thought for a moment, knowing words couldn’t begin to describe Gabriel. “He’s too old to ever even _consider_ someone like me…” Sam began with a sigh. “He’s this absolute god. You wouldn’t believe how hot he is. When I first met him, my jaw practically hit the floor. He’s got these eyes; I can’t tell if they’re green or gold but they’re full of mischief. His hair’s like a halo, it’s really blonde, and I swear it’s the softest thing I’ve ever seen. He has this dorky sense of humor, but still hilarious. He’s about an inch taller than me, and he’s got this smile… He’s even got a name to match his looks. Gabriel,” Sam felt a dreamy smile cross his face.

“I don’t care if he never likes me back, though. I just want to be near him as much as I can.” Sam told the trio with a bittersweet smile. He meant every word he’d said, even knowing that Gabriel would never love him back Sam would gladly suffer through an eternity of hell for the older man. Still, he held onto a tiny sliver of hope that someday his friend may feel even a small portion of the things he did.

His friends exchanged looks, glowing with happiness for their lovestruck friend. “Well, he sounds amazing. Would we be able to meet the man that’s stolen our little Sam’s heart?” Ash drawled, a shit eating grin on his face. Sam flushed again, looking down at his worn sneakers.

“I’m not sure. I don’t think he’d want a bunch of people at his apartment ogling him, but I could ask if you want.” But Sam didn’t want his friends to meet Gabriel. He felt possessive, for some reason, and he knew it was ridiculous.

For the rest of the day Sam found himself wrapped up in thoughts of Gabriel, few which were pure. Time seemed to crawl by at a snail’s pace, and he seriously considered skipping the last two classes and heading over to Gabe’s a little early. But if Dean found out, he would be furious; somehow he knew that Gabe would blab. Forcing the anticipation filled thoughts of Gabriel to the farthest corners of his mind; he tried to get through History and PE in one piece. He hated both classes, so he knew they’d be torturous on a good day. Now, he wasn’t even sure if he’d survive.

Sam knocked on Gabe’s door two hours later, suddenly nervous for no good reason. Gabriel must have been hanging out near the living room, because Sam barely had time to take a steadying breath before the door swung open. Like always, seeing Gabriel took his breath away. It took a moment for the smell of beer to waft into the hallway. Sam could see several bottles littering the living room, and Gabriel looked more than a little disheveled. From what he could tell, the older man had been drinking most of the day. Upon seeing Sam, he grinned as he slurred, “Sammy! Hey kiddo! Wanna play videogames?” His bleary eyes pleaded with Sam, and he couldn’t help but humor his friend.

“Sure Gabe,” Sam smiled as the man’s face lit up excitedly and dragged Sam inside, handing him a controller. Sitting beside him on the couch, he knocked a few bottles off the table and put his feet up. He had to admit, Gabriel’s game collection was impressive, going through several generations of consoles. Sam laughed at Gabe’s childish reactions; pouting when he lost, jeering whenever he won. Sam took the taunting in good humor, though remaining concerned about his friend's evidently intoxicated state.

A little while later, when Gabe had paused the game to grab some of his ever-present candy, Sam finally got up the courage to ask. “Gabriel, is everything all right? This is the first time I’ve seen you drunk, and you’ve always seemed against getting drunk.” He thought back to the conversation he thought he overheard, setting it aside for later discussion.

The older man looked at Sam in surprise, obviously not expecting the question. His usual lopsided grin cracked, falling apart before Sam’s eyes. Sam caught a glimpse of sadness and anger before his friend turned away. “’M fine Sammich. I wanted to forget is all. Sorry you had to see me like this.” Gabe told him hollowly.

He didn’t believe it for a minute, but knew his friend wasn’t ready to talk about it yet. Lord knew he understood the need to escape one’s demons; Dean and John had coped the same way. Sometimes, you just needed to escape for a while. So instead of preaching his usual sermon about the evils of alcohol, he shook his head and patted his friend’s shoulder.

“Gabe, I don’t need to know why you’re drinking. If you ever need to talk, I’m always here to listen. Promise you’ll talk to me if something’s wrong?” Sam pleaded, offering the only thing he could. Gabriel’s face crumbled for a moment, fading to agony that Sam hoped to never see again, before he shook his head and the lopsided grin returned.

“Kay, Samalam. I promise. Now can we drop it?” Clearly the older man wanted nothing more to do with the conversation. Like Dean always said, no chick flick moments.

Eventually- well into the evening, Gabriel sobered enough to hold a conversation. Although he’d been putting off the conversation as long as he could, curiosity won out. Sam needed to find out if his dream had really happened so he could sort out his feelings. He gently set down the controller, immediately gaining Gabriel’s attention.

“Last night after I fell asleep I could have sworn I heard you and Dean talking. Was that real?” He watched his friend’s face closely, waiting to see how he would react. First came surprise, just a slight widening of his eyes really, then uncertainty. He fidgeted with a bottle, eyes averted. Sam stayed silent hoping to encourage a response from the older man.

Finally, the man’s face flickered with embarrassment, a light blush coloring his cheeks. “Yeah, sorry Sammich, I didn’t mean to wake you. Dean was absolutely plastered when he walked in. Smelled like a liquor store. I honestly couldn’t believe he’d leave you alone for so long so he could drink, and I lost my temper a bit. I’m not an angel, Sammy.” He joked weakly. Sam nodded, satisfied.

“What about when you said I was precious, something to be protected?” This time it was Sam’s turn to flush, embarrassed at the sweet words he thought he heard. Those words precariously balanced on the edge of Sam’s consciousness, waiting to tip the scales either in the older man’s direction, or in favor of insanity.

Gabriel nodded sheepishly, a small smile playing across his lips. “I’m not going to lie, or try to play it off. Yeah, Sam, I said it and I believe it. I know you get annoyed at Dean’s protective streak, but I can’t pretend I’m not protective of you as well.” A warm fluttering feeling started in Sam’s chest, fanning the flames of the boy’s crush. He’d never felt so cherished or important before. Just as he was opening his mouth to respond, the door practically shook as someone- Dean probably; banged their fists against it. Gabriel rolled his eyes and stood, theatrically bowing. “Your chaperone has come to collect you, princess. Let’s not keep him waiting.”

Sam took the professed hand with a curtsy, cracking up even as the door shook again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story kind of took me by the hand and dragged me down an unexpected path. I decided to go along with it, so forgive me.


	4. Anger and Apologies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Dean go at it, and Sam finds himself at Gabriel's doorstep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay! A few things:  
> 1) I know its confusing. Read till the end.  
> 2) No I didn't skip a chapter.  
> 3) My beta and I have both been insanely busy lately, so not only is the chapter barely on time, but its also unbetaed. I may edit later on.  
> 4) To make it up to you, I'll post the next chapter within a week.  
> 5) fluff is on the way.
> 
> Thanks again to my wonderful beta maryssa172!

Dean’s face went lax in shock as hurt crept into his eyes. Too angry to feel much guilt, Sam took the opportunity to escape their apartment, shutting the door before his brother could do more than gape silently.

His feet carried him a fair distance away before his rage receded enough to let him take in his surroundings. Sam found himself beside an old dingy church, several blocks from the apartment building. Benches littered the ground, set out for smokers to take a break during mass. He threw himself on the nearest bench and let himself stew in the furious tempest of his own mind. Finding the anger wouldn’t fade, he decided to figure out what to do next. Though he tried to sort his thoughts, he found himself caught in a loop. First anger at his brother’s harsh words, then regret at his response, and guilt that he fought to shove aside until he felt dizzy. Remorse and fury fought for a place front and center in his mind. The sky started darkening before he knew it, and he got up with a sigh. Somehow, he felt more confused than when he left, and fury still blazed strong within him.

For a moment he hesitated, uncertain where to go. He couldn’t face Dean yet, not with the memory of his eyes full of pain up front in his mind. Without his consent, his feet started moving. He found himself standing in front of Gabriel’s apartment door, hand raised to knock. Not even questioning his urge to hide at his friend’s apartment, he knocked. Nothing. He knocked again with the same result. Shocked to find that Gabriel wasn’t home, Sam sat with legs curled to his chest leaning against the wall. Anything was better than continuing the argument.

The minutes seemed to stretch on endlessly, and Sam found himself drifting. Footsteps approaching snapped him out of it and he looked up to find Gabriel walking leisurely towards his apartment. His eyes widened almost comically when he recognized Sam, face splitting into his trademark smirk almost instantly. “Samalam! Hey, what’s up?” He asked, unlocking the door and leading the younger man inside.

“Sorry about the unexpected visit Gabe. I just needed to get away for a while, you know? Your apartment kind of became a haven for me.” Sam admitted sheepishly, silently praying Gabriel would leave it at that. For a single, terrifying moment, Gabe searched the younger boy’s eyes. Seeming satisfied, he shrugged and Sam thanked his lucky stars. At the moment he was still too enraged to really think about the argument.

They spent the next hour sitting in companionable silence, watching mindless TV while Sam struggled with his inner demons, fighting to calm down. Watching Gabe down an entire bowl of chocolate chips helped, the endearing image draining Sam of his negativity like light banishing the shadows. As soon as Sam relaxed fully, Gabriel muted the TV and set his bowl down. “Not that I dislike the visit, but why are you here Sam?” He’d known the question would come eventually, but his shoulders slumped just the same. Gabe’s tone was innocent, careful even.

Keeping his eyes fixed to the Television, Sam struggled to keep his tone light. “I told you, I needed to escape for a bit.” He felt the older man’s disbelieving gaze on him like a weight. He just couldn’t talk about things yet, especially with Gabriel.

“I don’t believe you, Sammich. Tell me whats going on, maybe I can help,” Gabe offered. Slightly annoyed by his persistence, Sam gave up on ignoring the older man and turned to face him. Amber eyes pleaded with him, no judgement reflected there.

“My brother and I, we had a fight. One of the worst ones yet, and I’m a little terrified to go back there and face him. So I figured your apartment’s the one place I could go.” He shrugged.

His friend nodded solemly, patting Sam’s shoulder. “That kind of stuff happens as you get older. Care to tell me what it was about? The fight I mean.” Gabriel offered, unknowing of the shitstorm that question would bring. 

Almost as if someone had pressed play, Sam’s memory of the fight flashed through his head.

_“I don’t think you should hang out with Gabriel anymore, Sammy. Your grades are slipping, you’re ignoring your homework, and you’re up until well past midnight. No college will accept you at this rate! Do you even care about getting into a good college?” Dean demanded angrily. They’d been fighting like this for well over an hour, and Sam was getting fed up._

_“Back off, Dean! So my grades drop a bit, big friggin deal.” Sam snarled, throwing his hands up in frustration. His brother just wasn’t getting the picture. He always had to be so focused on school; Dean didn’t seem to even care about what Sam wanted. For a moment, he considered just blurting the truth out, but after the way their traditionalist father had raised them he knew Dean would lose it._

_“You can’t be serious Sam! If your grades drop, you’ll have a shit future. Is that what you want?” Dean practically shouted, face inches from Sam’s._

_“You’re always so focused on my future, Dean. Are you afraid I’ll turn out like you?” He snapped, watching as hurt flashed in his older brother’s eyes. Feeling the tiniest bit satisfied, he continued, “Try to be my brother instead of turning into Dad!” Dean gaped at him, his mouth working furiously. Pain welled in his eyes; Sam’s barb had hit the mark._

_Silence stretched between them, haunted with the memory of their father. Feeling just the tiniest bit guilty, Sam whirled around and stalked out of the apartment._

“Dean was upset I had stopped focusing so much on my studies. I guess it was inevitable, but he pretty much demanded I stop coming over here. I- I may have said something a little too harsh.” Sam felt another wave of guilt crash over him even as his mind convinced itself that Dean deserved that pain after all he’d put up with. Gabriel grimaced knowingly and Sam wondered if he’d been through this before.

“Let me guess kiddo, he thinks I’m a bad influence.” Gabriel said flatly, “Not that I could disagree. I’ve given you nothing but sweets since we met. Your bloods probably half sugar by now.” Gabe laughed. Sam shoved him playfully, nearly toppling the older man.

“He didn’t mention that at all. Mostly, he thinks that I’m spending too much time here. He says school should always be my main focus, but I need to have some downtime too.” Sam’s brow furrowed. He couldn’t quite put to words how he felt about being told to stop seeing Gabriel’s brilliant smile in the afternoons, or how much spending time here meant to him. Any time he even thought of coming clean to Gabriel about his feelings, terror lanced through him. He wasn’t ready for rejection yet.

“Big brothers tend to do that, take it from me I’ve got three of them. I’m glad you came to me though, I told you this was a safe place for you, and I meant it.” Gabe smiled before his eyes lit up. “That reminds me! I have something I’ve been meaning to give you.” He sprung from the couch suddenly, rifling through a drawer in the kitchen before Sam could even blink. He came back holding out a key-ring with a single silver key hanging from it and handed it so the younger Winchester. “So next time I’m out, you don’t have to wait outside.” He grinned.

Feeling the weight of trust bestowed on him, Sam gratefully took the key and the knowledge he was truly welcomed into the man’s home. Hope sprung in his chest, warming him with the tantalizing sense of opportunity. Though a small part of him wanted to abuse the privilege, he knew responsibility was best. For now, his fantasies about Gabriel would suffice.

“You can stay as long as you need, Sammich. But some time from now, Dean’s going to be banging on my door. Threatening to break it down probably.” Gabe warned.

Sam fidgeted, feeling guilty. “Not that I mind, kiddo.” Gabe drawled, trademark smirk back in place. “Just wanted you to know the eventuality. Your older brother doesn’t scare me. I may be small, but I’m scrappy!” Gabe raised his fists, a glint in his eyes. The thought of the tiny blonde man fighting Dean made Sam burst into a fit of laughter. Grinning warmly, Gabriel patted his friend’s back. “I’m on your side, kiddo. Whatever the fight was about, I don’t care so don’t tell me, I’ll back you up. Dean’s an ass.”

“Thanks Gabriel. I… This means a lot to me. Seriously.” Sam couldn’t really express the wealth of emotions swirling inside of him. So instead he settled for a hug, surprising the older man. After a moment, Gabriel returned the hug, patting his shoulder awkwardly before moving away.

“So what’s it gonna be kid?” Gabe asked. Sam hesitated again, knowing his friend had been right. Dean would be furious if he stayed out forever, even after a fight. But at the same time, he _really_ didn’t want to face Dean yet. With a sigh, he pocketed the key and moved to leave.

“I’ll go home, much as I love the thought of you beating the shit out of Dean, he’s my brother. Thank you again, I promise to be responsible using your key.” Sam grinned at Gabe, a spark of mischief lighting up his eyes. Gabriel wasn’t the only one who could cause trouble, after all.


	5. Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time passes, and their friendship stays sturdy even if Sam's fantasies get a little more common. To Sam, its a normal day until its not. For Gabe- oh my god is it embarrassing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning at the end of note.   
> FINALLY!!! Okay so I've been waiting for this chapter to be finished for a while, things are going to start moving a little faster now. Now the plot may thicken. So I apologize for my shoddy writing about abuse... Physical abuse is something I've never experienced, so I did my best.  
> I somehow managed to sprain my wrist so it took a bit longer than planned. Don't hate me! *hides*
> 
> TRIGGER WARNING!!!!!!!!!!!!!   
> -mentions of past abuse.-

Several months later 

     Sam unlocked Gabriel’s apartment, not hearing a response to his persistent knocking. Dean was at it again now that finals were coming around again, and if he had to listen to one more of his brother’s rants he was going to blow his brains out. Gabriel’s apartment had honestly become a home away from home, and he felt ever closer to the man he idolized. Sometimes, Gabriel would look at him with something soft and warm in his eyes, and Sam could almost believe Gabe cared for him as more than a friend. But those were fantasies better left for the lonely hours of the night.  

     He heard rustling and a click, then Gabriel’s voice. “Sam? You’re here already? Shit.” Sam sat up to see Gabriel in nothing but a pair of boxers, sculpted abs and the barest hint of hipbones peeking from the waistband. His golden locks were mussed in what could only be described as sex hair, mouth swollen and red from kisses. The image went straight to his dick, fantasies of the many ways he could make Gabriel look like that. Front and center, his eyes glazed with lust, swollen lips wrapped around Sam’s cock. 

     Those fantasies died when a figure appeared behind Gabriel with long blonde hair and a decidedly feminine figure. His hopes for a chance with Gabe shattered into a thousand particulates as a stunningly beautiful woman peered over Gabriel’s shoulder. “I didn’t know you were expecting company… Hello there cutie,” she purred, catching sight of him. She walked around the blond man who stood frozen in place, hips swaying suggestively as she approached.  

     “You’re absolutely adorable! I haven’t seen you around before.  Where has Gabriel been hiding you?” She cast an accusing glance at the man in question. When no response was offered, she focused back on Sam. “Want to have some fun sweetheart?” Her voice turned even more sultry. Behind her, Gabriel stiffened, face stormy. Sam couldn’t speak, still struggling to come to terms with all the new information. Gabe’s female friend didn’t need an answer apparently, grabbing a hold of his arm with a predatory grin. 

     “Usually I need at least a drink before playing, but for you? Where’s your place?” Sam wondered if the thought of him refusing even crossed her mind. Though he could see her physical attractiveness, something about her made his skin crawl. Before he managed to get an answer out, Gabriel’s anger overtook his shock and he stalked towards the blonde woman. 

     Grabbing her roughly, he glared when she looked back. “He is off limits. You lay a single finger on him, and I swear Bela, I will hunt you down and end you.” He snarled, dragging her towards the door. A thrill shot through Sam at his aggression, but he quickly shot it down. Gabriel was straight. 

     The woman –Bela –smirked, not appearing the least dissuaded. “Possessive, are we? Trying to keep the best for yourself?” She challenged. Gabriel ignored her in favor of shoving her into the hall. “If you ever want to have fun, I’ll be at the bar.” She called to Sam before Gabriel shut the door. 

     With a sigh Gabriel leaned against the door breathing deeply for a moment. When he looked up, his smirk lacked the usual brilliance. “Hang on a sec kiddo, I need to get dressed. Then we are getting out of here.” Disappearing into his bedroom, Gabriel shut the door on a still confused Sam. The younger man collapsed on the couch, staring blankly at the ceiling as everything hit him at once.  

     Despair swirled in his heart, throwing everything out of focus. He had been so idiotic. So _blind_! He just assumed that Gabriel swung his way, never considering the alternative. Yet here it was, shoved in his face so blatantly he could barely breathe. 

     Gabe returned moments later, dressed in a pair of khakis and a green shirt that only accented his eyes. Sam stood and followed the older man outside silently, walking beside him as they walked through Eden Park. Sam knew Gabriel had hoped leaving the apartment would help dispel remaining awkwardness, he couldn’t find it in himself to care. Honestly, he was relieved.  

     “Sorry you had to see that, kiddo. I lost track of time,” Gabriel admitted sheepishly as they strolled. Sam shrugged, eyes focused on the stones beneath his feet while he struggled to suppress his attraction. So what, Gabriel had no chance of liking him. That didn’t mean anything had to change between them, right? 

     “No problem, Gabe. She seemed…” Sam trailed off, searching for the right word.  

     “Like a whore?” Gabriel supplied helpfully, smiling self-depreciatingly. “That’d be the best description for her. Promise me something, alright Sammich?” He waited until Sam nodded before continuing. “Never let that woman sink her claws into you. Its too late for me, but I’ll be damned if I let her get you. She’ll sell your soul in an instant.” 

“How’d you meet her anyway?” Sam asked, ignoring the request. 

     “Long story, kiddo. I was young and _far_ too inebriated for my own good, and she was more than willing… Look, just stay away from her. Letting her into my life was the absolute worst decision I ever made. I don’t want to see you go through the same thing.” Gabriel looked at him so earnestly, Sam couldn’t do anything but agree this time. Still, he wondered at the mysterious past the duo seemed to share.  

     They both fell silent, enjoying the peaceful atmosphere around them. A gentle breeze whispered through leaves above them, and children shrieked in delight. After a few moments of peace, Gabriel grabbed Sam’s hand and dashed towards a tiny building just off their path. As they approached, Sam noticed brightly painted tables and metal chairs. Sam could only guess that they sold sweet treats there, judging by his friend’s ecstatic expression. 

     Sure enough, they reached the window and Sam spotted the expansive selection of ice-creams to choose from.  Gabriel chatted with the man behind the counter for a while before ordering an obscene sundae drizzled with fudge and drowning in whipped cream. The men paid for their ice cream and settled at a red table to eat. Gabriel took his first bite and moaned. Sam’s dick twitched interestedly, but he shoved back his desire. _He’s straight_ , he reminded himself harshly.  

     Noticing Sam’s distraction, Gabriel grinned wickedly before wiping a smear of whipped cream across the younger man’s cheek. “Hey!” Sam yelped, glaring at his friend before grabbing some cream from his own sundae and returning the favor. Within moments both men were covered in whipped cream and laughing uncontrollably. 

     Under the glare of the shopkeeper, Sam and Gabriel dumped their now-empty bowls and escaped the shop laughing like teenagers. They settled on a bench a little ways away, still out of breath. 

     A few moments later, when they both had sobered enough to talk, Gabriel sighed. “Sammich, I’d love to keep ignoring the issue, but I think its about time you told me why you’re so jumpy all the damn time. And don’t lie to me kiddo, I know you’re scared of something and I want to know what it is.” The lightheartedness surrounding them dissipated instantly, like a bucket of cold water had drenched them both.  

     Sam stared at the ground in silence, suddenly overwhelmed by dark memories. Gabriel just stayed silent, waiting for the younger man to speak. Seconds ticked by, stretching into moments before the young Winchester spoke. “Did I tell you my mom died when I was six?” Gabe shook his head, and Sam continued. “Well, at first we were a really happy family. But then my mom died, and Dad kinda lost it. He started drinking, and disappearing for days on end. Sometimes he’d come home reeking of alcohol and cheap perfume. At first that was it, he’d get drunk and pass out. But eventually he started yelling at us, me mostly. I guess I reminded him too much of mom. Dean was out a lot of the time, school and work. One night, Dad hit me. Dean saw the bruise and started yelling, but it didn’t stop. 

     “Dean tried to protect me, he really did. I know Dad hit him too. Dean always got in the middle when Dad got drunk, but he couldn’t always be there for me. Dean was at work, and Dad came home really wasted. I was twelve at the time, and this had been going on for years. He just started screaming and throwing things. He said really awful stuff, and blamed me for mom’s death. Said I ruined everything; that I wasn’t worth keeping around. Said I looked too much like her. Then he hit me, over and over. He was still screaming. He was so angry.” Sam had to stop for a moment, the memories becoming too much to bear. Beside him, Gabriel was silent. Taking a deep breath, he continued. 

     “He punched and kicked me, over and over. I still see his face sometimes, red and twisted as he screamed at me. Everything got really dark, and then Dean was there. Dad… he wasn’t. Dean never told me what happened, but we packed our stuff and left that night. I had a broken arm, some cracked ribs, and a concussion… I’m still terrified that one day, Dad will find us and this time Dean won’t get there in time. That maybe this time it won’t stop. He was so angry, Gabe! So angry…” Tears started falling heavy and fast from his eyes, and Sam couldn’t stop them. Gabriel knew the worst parts Sam had kept to himself, but still… the things he’d endured.  

     “I swear, Sam. I’ll keep you safe. You don’t have to be scared anymore.” Gabe promised, letting the younger man sob into his shoulder. Slowly, ever so slowly, his sobs softened and eased. He picked up the sleeping boy gently, and started the long walk back to their apartments as the sky darkened behind him. “I hope to God your brother killed the bastard. Otherwise, I will.” 

 

 


	6. Reconciliation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean and Sam make some progress. Gabriel is clueless sometimes and Sam is hurting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry about the haiatus a lot of stuff's going on. Not sure when the next chapter will be out, my computer crapped out on me.

When he woke up in his own bed, stuffy nosed and hollow feeling, it took Sam a moment to understand exactly what happened the night before.

Chasing fragments of memories, he pieced the night together.

Going up to Gabriel’s and finding him half naked with a woman in tow. Rubbing his chest with a frown, he tried to push away the dull ache that had returned with that image. At least now he wouldn’t be pining over a man senselessly, he told himself firmly. 

Slowly he worked his way through the evening. They walked through Eden Park, got ice cream, and talked. As he recalled the nightmarish confession he told Gabe he groaned, burying his face in the pillows. God, what Gabriel must think of him now… especially after he’d ended up sobbing and clutching his friend’s shirt like a child. Sam wished he could disappear, never have to face his friend again.

A sharp rap on his bedroom door interrupted his spiraling humiliation. Without a word Dean came in and sat down on his bed, hair still unkempt. “So, Sam… Look I’m really not good with chick flick moments, so I just want to tell you I know, ‘kay? You don’t have to hide the fact that you’re into… ya’know… dudes.” Sam froze as his brother’s words sunk in.

“Wha- What are you talking about, Dean?” Sam tried to keep his voice steady but it cracked. Dean couldn’t know… was he that obvious? What if Gabriel saw it too? 

“Dude, relax. I’m not Dad. Who you screw is up to you, but if that asshole hurts you I will kick his ass.” Dean threatened. Sam’s heart clenched painfully at the reminder that Gabe would never be his. Why’d the perfect guy have to be straight?

“I- I don’t think he’ll get the chance.” Sam confessed, crestfallen. 

Dean nudged his shoulder playfully. “Gonna break his heart first, huh?” He joked, winking suggestively. Sam tried to smile, but failed. Deep down he knew Dean was just trying to joke around, but it still hurt.

“He’s straight Dean.” Sam said flatly. “He was fucking a woman when I went to his apartment yesterday. I never even had a chance.” Bitterness edged into his tone as self-loathing washed over him in waves. Like Gabriel would have gone for skinny, geeky Samuel Winchester anyway. Ha.

“Shit man, that’s rough.” Dean seemed at a loss for words for a moment. “Wait, you saw him-?” Sam winced, expecting an outburst of anger from his older brother. A moment of silence passed before the room rang with laughter. Sam looked up to find Dean’s head thrown back, shaking with mirth.

“Sorry Sammy, I know it hurts. But can you imagine…?” He broke off laughing again, and Sam couldn’t help but smile, chuckling along with his brother at the awkwardness of his situation. “God, he must have been humiliated!” 

Their laughter bounced off the walls, making the whole apartment seem brighter somehow. “I can’t remember the last time I’ve heard you laughing.” Sam said with a fond smile. Dean sobered instantly at that, sending a chill through the room.

“Yeah… It’s been a rough few years I guess.” Dean said, running his hand through his hair distractedly. “Sorry Sammy.” He cracked a smile, brushing aside his little brother’s concern. 

“It’s not your fault, Dean. I know you’ve been trying to look out for me.” Sam tried to comfort him, uncomfortable with the ‘chick-flick moment’ as Dean would call it. The eldest Winchester shot Sam a grateful look before grumbling something about coffee and leaving Sam to ponder his thoughts alone.

Nearly a week passed before Sam felt he could even face Gabriel again. He’d spent the time repressing his unwarranted crush, and secretly pining for the older man. His embarrassment had faded a bit, thankfully. Another visit couldn’t hurt, could it? He could handle himself, and the thought of never seeing his friend’s golden eyes again was painful to say the least. Gathering his courage, he climbed the stairs and quickly found himself face to face with the man. Silently he thanked the stars it wasn’t a bad time again. 

“Sammich! I haven’t seen you in ages!” His friend exclaimed, welcoming him inside with an exaggerated wave of his arm.  
Smiling up at Gabe, Sam couldn’t help but relax a bit. “Sorry Gabriel.” He shrugged, offering no excuses. It would all sound too fake, and the truth… well neither of them were ready for it yet.

Thankfully Gabe didn’t press for reasons, accepting the apology wordlessly. They sat on the couch and Gabe booted up his Xbox. Within minutes they were joking around like always.  
“Ha! Take that Winchester!” Gabe slammed his controller down, arms thrown up in victory. Rolling his eyes, Sam tried to hide his smile. Gabriel was just too enthusiastic for his own good sometimes. 

“Rematch?” He asked, watching a smirk cross Gabriel’s face at the challenge.

“You must be a masochist, kid. I’ll just beat you again, like the past fifteen games.” He boasted. 

“Sure, sure. Just start the game asshole.” Sam snarked, grinning as his friend did just that. A few minutes into the game Asia started blasting from the phone sitting beside Gabriel, startling both men. Immediately, Gabriel was on the phone game forgotten. 

“Hey, haven’t heard from you in years! Wait, what- hang on.” Gabe said, looking at Sam guiltily. Without a word, Sam stood and started making his way out, nodding at Gabe with a smile. No hard feelings, he tried to say with his eyes. From the sound of it, the call was really important.

“Okay, say again? Mmhmmmm…. You did what? Well why didn’t you call one of your buddies? What the hell do you expect me to do from here? What? What the fuck?” The conversation continued until Sam shut the door behind him, wondering vaguely who Gabriel dropped everything to talk to. Probably another woman, he thought dejectedly. Fighting back the unfair jealousy he felt, he tried to keep his thoughts purely innocent.

After all, he could ask Gabriel tomorrow if he really wanted to know what the call was about. Not like Gabe was going anywhere.


End file.
